Sickies

Well, we've got the sickies today. Ben is just full-on sick, and I'm full-on homesick. We are quite the combo. Ben woke up with a headache, which is unusual, and he was crying for daddy. On a typical morning, he is bobbing around excitedly, getting ready for his day. He also felt warm to me when I was rubbing Vaseline into his dry, chapped hands. I asked him to lay down in bed, and he just wilted. I was going to go to church today, but I think I will just read my scriptures instead.

As for me, I thought I was too old to feel homesick. I thought I was way beyond that, but I'm clearly not. My tenth anniversary was last week, my good friend passed away, and my hubby told me some dear friends will be moving away in a few months. I miss my other kids. I know I need to just buck up, but being stuck in my room here is enabling the pity party to go on. Woe is me. I had to laugh yesterday when my mom asked me if anything was really making me happy. It reminded me of a survey the clinic gave me the day we started, which asked if "my last purchase made me happy." Yes, things still make me happy, I'm not that morose.

This is just one of those times I long to be home. I think the last trip to a feeding clinic (2006) felt better because I was staying with a friend's parents. They were a wonderful support to me, and gave me the feeling of having a home away from home. We miss "Lilla" and "Papa." I think things will get better when I can see my sis in a couple of weeks, after her vacation. Till then, I'm hanging in, and eating chocolate.